December 2011
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Closing 2011 not with a bang but a KDOOOOOOMSH
I made mashed potatoes earlier this week. Incredibly, the grocery store was out of heavy cream, so I grabbed half & half instead. The potatoes came out fine. But I still had a bunch of half & half. The fuck was I going to do with it? Not more mashed potatoes; I’ve got mashed potatoes for days. I decided to make chicken tikka masala. So now I have a bunch of chicken tikka masala, and...
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“All four of them had expressed fear, not that they would characterize it as...”
– I wish Nightmare Brunette wrote more often, but maybe I’m just a selfish person.
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The Adventure Time theme song is stuck in my head
It’s literally a ten-second piece of music. It won’t stop. I’m tempted to get out my phone, dial people’s numbers at random, and sing it to them. Even better if it lands in their voicemail. I have no explanation for this urge other than that I’m about to beat Arkham Asylum and the Joker has performed a memetic transfer into my consciousness as a last-ditch escape...
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I am a ridiculous person
I’m coming to the conclusion that I have increasingly little idea what to do with myself when I’m at my house for an extended period of time. Now that Tumblr has been checked, I have at least two hours before I even start to feel sleepy, and I’m paralyzed by a surfeit of choice. Do I
Play more of Arkham Asylum? I’ve been having such a good time with it, I don’t want...
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Well now
Passing yet another billboard with Noomi Rapace’s name and face on it, it occurred to me that I had absolutely no idea how to pronounce her first name. “Noo-mee”? “No-mee”? “Noo-oh-me”? “Constantine”? No help with the last name, either. “Ruh-pass”? “Ray-pass”? “Rah-pah-chay”? “Transcendentalism”?
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LAZY MUSIC MAN 2011
One reason I like the end of the year is because it’s time for music people to talk about their favorite albums of 2011, which inevitably reveal something I missed that I’ll end up loving. Summer Camp’s Welcome to Condale is the current leader in this category for the opening track alone. More. More!
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Personal harmony
One of the things I like most about driving by myself is getting to sing along to stuff that would probably seem really weird if someone else happened to be in the car; I’ve developed harmony parts for songs that probably shouldn’t have ‘em. Is my brain making shit up again, or was there a reality show at one point that was nothing but hidden-camera footage of people singing...
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Anonymous asked: It seems you complain about tumbler a lot, why not leave?
crack-the-coconut asked: What's something adventurous you did as a kid either by yourself or with friends? Bonus points if it involved jumping over something with your bike!
dennisculver asked: 39
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I admit it
Those things that get reblogged with all the numbers that stand for questions to put in people’s askboxen irritate me from a UX standpoint, because the number:question correlation takes work to go back and uncover. Sometimes you can infer the question from the answer, but more often than not, it’s more work than I want to do when I’m reading Tumblr. Why not just ask people...
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Something I just realized
My housemates are all gone for the holidays. I’m tempted to walk around the place naked, but the front kitchen blinds are open and I don’t want to start a stampede.
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"An extra inch and you become the Love Guru."
This was a spam subject I received today. It apparently comes from a parallel universe where The Love Guru was a smash hit movie. What if this is how our scientists finally prove the existence of other quantum realities? I’m going to start keeping a closer eye on my spam subjects from now on. If any pop up that mention “Vice President Palin,” I’m going to start clamoring...
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Because they could
I’m going on a self-imposed media blackout for The Dark Knight Rises and Prometheus (which I’m going to refer to mentally as Alien 0 per Andy’s directive), but that doesn’t mean I can’t watch the trailers I already saw repeatedly.
If you watch the Prometheus one on YouTube, you’ll notice two things:
They turned the little progress point into a snowflake
...
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20th time == the charm
The Twitter <-> Facebook integration appears to be working again, after so many long cold months.
I have no idea why this particular time I disconnected everything, cleared cache, and reconnected worked. I just know it did.
IT’S AN XMAS MIRACLE*
* I pronounce this holiday the Futurama way whenever possible.
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Unrelatedly
Thank you to everyone who’s answered my “moist” survey thus far. The results are very interesting!
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Oh for FUCKSAKE
Everybody who’s mad at this “Lego for girls” thing:
They did research. It turns out lots of girls don’t like to play with Lego. So now they’re making Lego they think those girls will like. They’re trying to reach a market segment that’s currently not being served. That’s all. It’s not like they’re trying to make some kind of Normative...
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Malphoneme?
I have what seems like several woman friends who don’t like the word “moist.” I’m not sure what it is — the sound? unpleasant association?* — but something about that word in particular just makes them shudder. It’s not limited to one person, either. But do I just have a weird group of friends?
What I want to know is:
Do you not like the word...
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A sentence you never want to be associated with...
“He had a surprising amount of poop in him,” medical examiners said of the victim today; authorities claim this latest revelation, though unexpected, will have little bearing on the ongoing investigation.
We all have those moments where we worry about our brains, right? I’m just checking here.
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Hello again
Saw the coyote again tonight. I think I’m going to start blogging every coyote sighting with a tag, so I can see how many times I actually see that dude in a year. It’s the only way to be sure.*
* I apparently had seven xenomorph dreams in 2011.
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DSM-5 Diagnoses for Toad from Arnold Lobel's Frog... →
Not gonna lie: made me laugh.
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I need to talk about The Hunger Games for a second
Mostly I need to state the opinion that Suzanne Collins deserves recognition for her character names alone, if nothing else. Okay, just two: “Katniss Everdeen” and “Effie Trinket” are amazing. Both names manage to be musical to the ear while keeping a kind of logic within the world of the story. Does that make sense? They just seem like utterly perfect character names to...
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Another on the list of "euphemisms for doin' it... →
Because I’m a weird, weird person.
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The mutable borders of pharmaceutical determinism
Spam subject: “Attract the RIGHT girls with wonder pills!!”
Does this mean there’s a pill out there I can take that will cause me to somehow attract the WRONG girls? What would that even look like?
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And then there was the time I dreamed I was Ron...
I think I’m going to sleep with this noise on for the rest of my life if I can continue to have dreams like that.
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“A staggering 48% of all Americans are either considered to be “low income” or...”
– 50 Economic Numbers From 2011 That Are Almost Too Crazy To Believe (via courtenaybird)
Assuming all of these studies are reasonably reliable, this single slideshow provides enough fodder to fuel the Occupy movement from now until the heat death of the universe.
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Cryogenics technology still has a few bugs in it,...
Because I’m willing to risk them if it means I can get into a hibernation pod today and have someone decant me the day The Dark Knight Rises comes out. This trailer made me hyperventilate.
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The lurking fear
I’m afraid this “wearing a scarf without a coat” thing is going to become a habit from roughly 2p until it’s time to leave, if the last two days have been any indication. Pray for me.
#shit #damn #apocalypse
